There’s a Superman in all of us

Today is the 85th anniversary of Superman. And if you can’t tell from the above photo, I’m a BIG fan…and no, it’s not because of his chiseled jawline, perfect ebony hair, or massive lats.

It’s because he represents a self-actualized human with a narrative arc that shows his struggle to become who he is. This arc is important because it applies to all of us.

Let me break it down:

• He was an outsider trying to fit in
• He discovered and lives his values — Truth, Justice, and the American Way
• He’s keenly aware of his weaknesses

Superman the Outsider

Superman is an immigrant to Earth. From a young age, he knew he was different, making him feel like an outsider. I think many of us can relate to this feeling. Where do I fit in? Why don’t people understand me? Will I be accepted as I am, or do I have to hide my true nature to conform?

In many adaptations of his childhood biography, we see that his efforts to hide who he really is resulted in tragedy — including in Man of Steel, when he doesn’t save his father to protect his identity.

Only when he leans into what makes him unique, without fear of being ostracized, is he finally accepted.

My nature is to be very open and giving. When I was younger, I thought this was a weakness. People say that friendships should be symmetrical, that you should make sure there’s a balance in who reaches out, how much you share, and so on.

When I believed that and followed those “rules,” I was holding back — keeping score, if you will. Once I let that go, I felt — and actually became — liberated. The friends that are good for me reciprocate in their own amazing ways, and the ones who aren’t…well, are they truly friends?

Truth, Justice, and the American Way

Once Superman accepted who he was, he leaned into his core values.

• Truth — If we deny seeing things as they are, avoid critical conversations, and hold on to limiting beliefs, we only damage ourselves. It’s often convenient in the moment to turn away from the truth, but that merely delays the pain of dealing with the truth, as no one can run from it forever.
• Justice — We have a duty to treat ourselves properly. When we do so, we learn to treat others properly. When we respect our personal value, we learn to value others and are in a position to help them when they aren’t being treated properly.
• The American Way — To me, the best version of America is a compassionate meritocracy. We do have a right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. This comes with the responsibility to accept that our fate is in our own hands and that viewing ourselves as victims never helps. As we take on more personal responsibility and accumulate success, we use our power and resources to help others on their hero’s journey.

Know Your Weaknesses

Superman is keenly aware of his weakness to kryptonite, and he avoids it at all costs. How many of us know certain things are bad for us and keep them around anyway? For me, it was coping with consumption (like food and cigarettes), gossiping, and micromanaging. It was only when I let go of these bad habits that I was able to begin to bring my whole self into being. (This is a work in progress!)

Think of it this way: Ingesting multivitamins won’t improve our health as much as ceasing to ingest arsenic. Likewise, thinking positive thoughts won’t help until we get a handle on our negative self-talk. I discuss this concept more here.

The takeaway? There’s a Superman in all of us, just waiting to be unleashed!